Transition Week 5

Brandon and I are now 5 weeks into the new living arrangement.  Brandon is living with Chris in Austin at our condo during the week while he is in school and then comes to Dripping Springs on the weekends and spend the weekends with me.  The first three weeks went great.  Brandon was very happy.  In fact, at lunch during one weekend I asked Brandon how he liked the new arrangement.  He said "I don't like it - I LOVE IT, ALL OF IT".  That was great.   I was very happy as well. 

But the 4th week came and Brandon started to realize his mom was not there.  Chris started activity time in the evenings with Brandon and they decided to go bike riding.  Brandon has a three wheeler bike we had fixed before Chris and Brandon moved into the condo.  Brandon was riding on the bike and he fell over as he was going down a hill.  He was scraped up and wanted his mommie.  So Chris and Brandon called me on "facetime".  Brandon was crying.  He calmed down, took a bath and went to bed.  The same day I changed our weekend plans due weekend work which resulted in a 2 day respite weekend and the school changed their plans for fun Friday.  It was all too much for Brandon and on Friday during his time to utilize his IPAD, he and the school called me.  Brandon just started crying and he cried on for a good part of the day.  I decided that Brandon should come home that night and asked my brother to stay with him while I went to a fundraiser.  When I got home Brandon was much better.  We talked throughout the weekend and Brandon asked me if I kicked him out of the house and if he could ever come back.  I KNOW.  Serious guilt.  It really broke my heart and still does.  But I explained to him that the house in Dripping Springs is also his house and he is always able to come to the house.  He asked me about where he would stay on holidays. He also asked if after he finishes school in three years could he come back to Dripping Springs.  I told him as that gets closer in three years we would decide.  I found out from these conversations that I need to be very clear with Brandon on the schedule and try not to have too many unexpected changes.  So we all got out the calendars and went over the next few months with Brandon and we will continue to go over them as much as he needs. 

Brandon also went to the UT Best Buddies matching party.  I think Brandon was very excited to meet his matching buddy, but his matching buddy did not attend the party.  There were may UT students matched with adults and young adults.  I can see that Brandon will eventually love this.  It will be great for working on socialization.  But not all bad.  Brandon met a really sweet girl "Ryan" and she talked to him about leaving her parents and moving to Texas for school.  She told him that was like Brandon moving into the condo for his school.  I think Brandon liked that conversation.  She agreed to email Brandon.  That is a great start. 

Brandon also started his speech therapy at UT.  They did an assessment on Brandon to determine where he is in his speech.  I really was very touched by how far Brandon has come in 19 years.  When Brandon was 4 he barely said one word and I was sitting with Brandon in this room as he read complex questions and provided answers verbally.  Brandon read all the questions easily and correctly.  His responses we mostly understandable.  I think living with Chris and having new people at school has made Brandon understand he needs to try very hard to speak as clearly as possible so people can understand him.  I was so proud of him.  He has really come so far. 

We are moving into week 5 weekend.  I have been incredibly busy traveling for work, taking care of Brandon logistics, getting the house organized and working on my mom's house.  But for the first time in 19 years I am also preparing for a 2 week vacation to Europe to see my brother Jack.  I am going with three girlfriends - going to Paris, Nice France (French Riviera) and Italy.  We will end up at the Truffle Festival in Alba, Italy.  Brandon is all set for a weekend with Ross and a weekend with Chris with a week in-between where I will be gone.  Looking forward to a little time off.

All for now.
Leah

Transition Week Two

Many of you have asked me this week how Brandon is doing as he entered week two of transition.  Thanks for asking.  If you are a parent with a child going off the college or off to work and moving out of the house, you may relate to our transition.  I am happy to report that week 1 and week 2 have been great.  Brandon is very happy. Brandon made it through week one just fine.  He knows everyone at the school and the staff working with him all know and love Brandon.  That has helped tremendously.  The school's adult transition program has also doubled in size and for Brandon that has been good with more classmates for socialization.  Brandon is loves the school environment. Brandon is picked up each morning with his favorite bus driver and the routine is the same as last year.  That has helped.  Ross is with him everyday that Brandon is at school.  Brandon loves Ross and that has helped.  His new companion Chris has a great deal of experience with young adults transitioning and has been very slow to begin the process for Brandon to be more accountable in his life.  That has helped.  Chris's personality is similar to Brandon's (calm and laid back) and that has helped.  And of course there is music.  Chris and Ross are musicians and Brandon loves music.  That has helped.

I wanted to set up a fairly regular schedule with Brandon for the year so he knows what is coming next.  Brandon's speech therapist worked with Brandon to set up a calendar on Brandon's IPAD (his communication device) so he knows what is happening next.  Brandon is happiest when he knows what will happen next and there are no big surprises.

Chris is adjusting to having someone living with him and working with Brandon on privacy and roommate rules.  That is working fairly well. I am still working the daily things as they come up and trying to figure out how those can run smoothly.  These include things like ordering and delivering supplies, ordering and dividing out medications, making sure everyone is where they are supposed to be and communicating with the school/therapist/doctors.  I think this will work itself out as we move into more of a routine.  Brandon is also very happy coming to my house on the weekends and having time for himself during the weekend. 

I know that in order for this arrangement to work Brandon needs to find friends, find his space in the world and know he is valued.  So Brandon also will begin "We are the Chorus" next week so he can participate in music.  He also will begin Special Olympics.  He is participating in a social group on Wednesdays, but he will move into Special Olympics during that time. Brandon is working with the University of Texas Special Education Department.  They will assign a student to work with Brandon and we will want to concentrate on socialization and jobs.  As part of his participation, Brandon will also join Best Buddies UT  (http://www.utbestbuddies.com). I hope he will get some additional social opportunities through the program.  Brandon can also receive additional speech support from the Speech department at UT. 

This week we also focused on jobs.  Brandon had a job last year at Seton.  This is a volunteer job. He started back at this job this week and everyone there was glad to see him.  I will be working to see if we can find other job skills to learn through Seton.  The best news - Brandon was selected to be a volunteer at KOOP radio AND work at the time slot for the Beatles show.  I am hoping that is a great match for Brandon because he loves the Beatles.  Brandon knows every little fact about the Beatles and can name the entire Beatles library.  So this is a really good job match. 

But as a mom, the most important thing for me is that Brandon is happy.  From all reports back to me, everyone says Brandon is happy and that is the best result for me. 

I know many of you have also asked - what about Leah.  Well I am taking the opportunity to again work on getting back in shape and eating healthy.  I have started walking again (I stopped the regular routine this summer) and the goal is to be down 25 pounds by mid-Oct.  I have 7 more to go.   And I am just now starting to think about what will life look like with a little extra time after 19 years. 

We will keep you updated as we work through the transition.  Thanks for all your kind words and support. 
Leah